Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Wow. I forgot about this.

So, I forgot that I had a blog that I use to update regularly. My life musta went beyond crazy and I didn't realize it.

I did break my arm back near Labor Day and have a pretty kickass scar now from surgery on it. Maybe that's where I fell off the bandwagon - AND BROKE MY ARM.

Oh those damn bandwagons, always getting in my way of falling softly.

I remembered this blog, because I'm on twitter now - gotta love those social networking sites.

www.twitter.com/tamzilla

And it asks for a website, and this is the closest thing I got to it. So yay for twitter reminding me I had a blog!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Look baby, a Unicorn!

Al and I have been riding to work together for the past few days, just to save a few precious dollars since Xmas is a month away. We don't really talk much in the morning, a few grunts, some groping and we're good to go. If we do end up talking, well, the conversations are, at minimum, borderline ridiculous.

Today is a good example.

As I'm driving I look to my right at a pasture, there is a horse grazing.

Tam: Look baby, a unicorn.
Al: I bet he's hiding out from the government.
Tam: He's wearing an Invisa-horn, so no one can tell he's a unicorn.
Al: Yeah, he's got too. Back taxes for those horns are a bitch.

No laughter, nothing that would say this conversation is anything less than serious. We totally need our own reality show, fo' rizzle.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

The Little Mermaid

Growing up The Little Mermaid was probably my favorite Disney movie, and so the other day as I was searching through artists to listen to while working - I found the soundtrack to the Broadway musical. I've been listening to it for the past two days, pretty much non-stop from 8 to 5.

Remember how I previously mentioned I become obsessive with books, and start tracking down author websites, reading everything, buying other books they've come out with - Yeah, well, now I've done that with this musical. Only I'm pretty sure I won't ever buy tickets to see it, mostly because it's in New York and well, I'm in Texas.

I've looked up clips from it on You Tube and researched the performers.

Oh, and something interesting I found out - they use those 'heelys' so that they can glide across stage like they're swimming through water, but then they can also use those if they want to appear as if they're walking.

Anyway, other than being obsessive about Disney characters my life has been pretty boring. Which is a good thing, I like boring most times it's nice to just be able to wind down for a few weeks. It'll be over with next week when I start studying for finals, but I'm not going to think about that. Or at least try not too.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Vacation

So, we went on vacation like a month ago. You know, to Arizona. We decided to take a road trip, because we thought it'd be cheaper than two airline tickets roundtrip. We were most definitely wrong, but we got some fun pictures outta it. And a lot of random arguments and eye rolling. Not to mention 20 dollars worth of gas on the ground at the gas station, good times good times. Some pictures below.

77 foot waterfall we found when we took a 'scenic route'




My humor is unmatched, nor is my sister's bum.


The relations.

Again, the humor.

Probably the only time in either of our lives that we actually felt tiny.

The Grand Canyon. Oh, and a chinese girl's butt.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Life Update II

I'd like to retract my previous statement on the post before, Life does get better.

I received a free picture magnet, notepad and 4 postcards this morning when I checked the mail.

On the flipside I also received my electric bill which was twice as high as normal. So, maybe life is just evening out.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Life Update

I received free tampons in the mail today.

Life can't get much better than that.

Friday, May 23, 2008

The Crazy Couple

Alfred and I are really two peas in a pod, I don’t think anyone else would be able to master my sense of humor the way he does. We play off each other when in public with other people so much that people are often surprised at how far we will take things. Neither of us get embarrassed easily, and to be honest – we like being ‘the crazy couple’.
Last night, at a party we attended (well it wasn’t really “a party” but more like a work/school function we had to attend for Alfred) we fell back easily into our pattern of mockery and self-degradation. With the exception of LJT this year (which I’ll get to at a later post, hopefully) we haven’t had the chance to gang up on someone in months.
It may sound like we pick on or bully people, but it’s all in good humor and generally speaking they’re all for it. We had a good table last night and below are a few conversation excerpts we participated in.

Girl#1: Yeah, I just dyed the pink in my hair. I really like it but my husband doesn’t. But he just told me not to cut it short, because that’s what I really wanted to do.
Me: How short were you going to cut?
Girl#1: Short bob, probably to my chin and tapered back.
Me:Sounds cute.
*Girl#1’s husband comes back from wherever he was*
Alfred: I think that pink in your hair is sexy.
Me: Yeah, it’s super cute.
Alfred: You know what would be super sexy?
Me: OH, If she cut it. Like short, that’d be hot.
Girl#1 husband: No. She’s not cutting it.
Me: But she’d be so much..
Alfred: hotter.
Me: If I were you I wouldn’t pay attention to him, all of us think it’d be a great idea to cut your hair.
Alfred: yeah.
Other people around the table: Cut it. Yeah. That’d be sexy. Do it.

Her husband was not happy with us.

Girl#1 Husband to me: So, are you a natural blonde?
Me: Yeah, totally. I mean, the fact that I have brown roots means absolutely nothing.
Al: She’s actually brown shag, if you know what I mean.
*Shocked looks*
Me: Yeah, I’ve been growing it out for years, sometimes Al brushes it for me.
Al: I really like to grab on to it like some reigns when we’re fucking. *Al makes horse noises*
Me: Yeah, but only after I braid it. Actually, I have pink bows in it now that Al gave me for Christmas they’re my favorite.
Al: You’re so hot right now.
Me: You wanna do it on the table.
*we both pretend to start making out and Al licks my face*

The people at the table, hilarious, they weren’t sure if we were lying until he started licking my face. It was great.

Later, after we eat they decide to give out awards and whatnot and take pictures of those people. So, we’re suppose to keep quiet in this room of about 40 people until they finish, that way we can clap for everyone at the end.

They go through a couple people before they call Al’s name.
When they call his name –

Me: WoOOOOO!
*Pause and silence*
Me: No? Not good timing, ok, right.
*Laughter*
Al: (at the front about to take his picture) Woohoo! I love you baby! (in a very redneck, hillbilly voice as he rubs his nipples)

That pretty much closed the night out and as we headed home we decided we totally need our own reality show.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Just what I want to do on a Saturday

Our washer is leaking water, causing lots of curses to be thrown about and pants to be worn multiple times. We thought we just needed to clean out the pipes but upon further inspection we found out that the pipes under our house are dying. We need to fix them. To prevent us from having to bust up our kitchen floor, we’ve opted to dig underneath the house. Alfred has asked a friend to help out in doing this, and by help we mean pay the guy.

Conversation from last night regarding the broken pipes -

Tam: So were you able to get that guy to help us out this weekend?
Al: Yeah, a 100 bucks a day. So, what I need you to do is be there for me.
Tam: I’m not digging underneath the house, I’ve got things I need to do that are above ground.
Al: No, I mean, I’m paying this guy a 100 bucks a day. If we work hard we can get it done in one day spending only 100 bucks. But if we don’t get it done, I’m going to owe him 200.
Tam: Oh, okay, so what do you want me to do then?
Al: I need you to stock up water, Gatorade, tea and bring it to us when we need it. I want food here, so we don’t have to stop. Tacos, sandwiches what the fuck ever – I want to bust this shit out in 8 hours, and I don’t want food or water to be a distraction.
*silence*
Tam: So, what you’re saying is – Saturday I’ll be your bitch.
Al: Yeah, that pretty much sums it up.

Monday, April 7, 2008

SunBurn - As told by MS Paint

Because it was 80 and beautiful outside this last Saturday, I opted to wear a tank top while working in the garden. Because I was enjoying myself and didn't really expect to be out there more than 30 minutes, I didn't realize the sun had it out for my back.



So, today, I give to you my very first MS Paint experience.

I've named it "The Essence of Sun Beams"

Thursday, April 3, 2008

April Fool's

My sister's best friend called me to tell me my sister was in jail.
After I sufficiently freaked out she yelled - "April Fool's!"
Since it was actually my sister's prank on her, but then she played it on me - we decided my sister was the true mastermind that we had to get back.

So, on April 2nd her best friend told her I found Alfred cheating on me and that I couldn't get a hold of her.
She didn't believe her, guessing it was a joke to get her back for her 'jail prank'.
I forgot that we were doing the joke, because I had slept since then.
Alfred played along, telling her he didn't know where I was, and he didn't go home that night.
She believed it was true because I never answered her phone calls.
I was in a meeting for 4 hours, and had no idea this was happening.

At 5, I had 15 missed called, 8 new voicemails and 4 text messages.

BEST APRIL FOOL'S JOKE EVER.

Friday, March 28, 2008

My Toes

I feel like my toes are exceptionally perfect today. The polish matches my skirt. I attempted to take a picture of them to show you how awesome they are, but...


the picture just doesn't do justice to how they make me feel today.


Thursday, March 27, 2008

Touch My Body

I've had this song stuck in my head for the past two damn days and the only words I know are "touch my body, throw me on the floor."

Sometimes I replay conversations in my head, usually twisting them around to my liking - I do it with songs too.

Not unusual, at least I don't think so, I assume a lot of people do this. My problem with it is sometimes I dive too deep into it and end up saying things out loud.

Usually in public.

And that's what happened about 45 minutes ago in Wal-Mart as I was waiting to check out.

The look on the couple's face in front of me - Priceless.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Happy Things

Things that have made me happy today :

- Math re-test went particularly well (I hope)
- The sun is out. It’s 88 outside and beautiful.
- It’s Friday.
- Next week is spring break which means I have no classes and actually get to go HOME at 5. Amazing.
- The Dreamgirls soundtrack
- Stepping on the scale and seeing a 2 pound reduction
- The sweet tea at lunch didn’t taste like arse.
- I only had to blow my nose 4 times today, as opposed to the 40 times last Friday.


Honestly, it doesn’t take much. Now, all I have to do is keep up the awesomeness for the remaining semester.

What little things have made you happy recently?

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Cheater

These past couple of weeks with classes I have been frantically scribbling down notes and re-reading material, all in hopes of pulling off at least two A’s in 4 of my classes. A personal goal I set for myself that doesn’t seem too far-fetched and completely attainable.

One of these classes is business calculus. Although I studied myself into a crazy frenzy before the first test, I only managed to pull a 61. Not happy with myself, I vowed to do much better on the second test – which I took last Thursday. When I turned over my exam today and saw the bright red 86 in the upper right hand corner, I couldn’t help but whisper a ‘yes’ to myself and break out into a huge grin. And because 5 out of 8 people in my class failed the first test, the teacher has allowed a make-up exam. I take that next week. I’m hoping that I get better than the 61, but if I don’t we’re allowed to drop our lowest test grade. I’ll just have to make sure I do well on all the remaining tests.

In this class, I sit caddy corner to a tall, lanky fellow who, since the first day of class, irks me. (Wow, check out all those comma’s!) I couldn’t place my finger on what it was exactly, I just had a feeling about him and although I’m always friendly if he asks a question or forgets to bring a pencil – I try not to communicate with him unless necessary.

Today he asked what I made, proudly I stated an 86. He made an 82. Because of our seating arrangement, and because I tend to be nosy – I was glancing at his exam to see which problems he missed. The teacher goes over the exam, problem by problem so as to clear up any misunderstandings we may have about the work. Today was no different as he went through each problem. I noticed on a particular problem, this lanky fellow merely forgot to write whether the hypercritical numbers – if graphed- would be concave up or concave down. I thought to myself, I’m glad I remembered to study that part otherwise I would have forgot too. I almost felt sorry for him that so many points were taken off of his test because he simply forgot to draw an upside down arch.

But that feeling vanquished when at the end of that particular problem’s review, he told the teacher that he had exactly what was written but it was marked wrong on his exam. He did NOT have what was written, in fact, he just simply drew what was needed while the teacher’s back was turned. Now, normally, I would just tell myself that I must have saw wrong on his test – but I clearly remember feeling almost sorry for him.

I wanted to say something, I wanted to call him a liar in front of the class, I wanted to place a paper-cut in between each of his fingers, but I didn’t. I’m not saying that I’ve never sneaked a peek at someone else’s answer, but never have I cheated AFTER the exam. And the thing is, he passed the first test with a 90, and this second with an 82 (well an 86 now). It’s not like he was going to have to drop the class.

I was tempted to stay after class and talk to the teacher, but I just stared at the lanky boy, shook my head and walked out of the room. Should I have said something? Was it my place? Or will it eventually catch up with him in the end? Or maybe am I only angry because I studied for hours on end to remember to put that damn arch on the table and all he had to do was wait for the teacher to go over it after the fact?

I’m seriously considering bringing it to the teacher’s attention next class, but I hate to be a ‘tattle-tale’. I probably need to let it go, but right now – I’m just going to silently curse him to life of miserable loneliness.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

There Is No Arizona

Well, there isn't according to country singer Jamie O'Neal, but I fully intend to prove her wrong this upcoming May.

You see, my mom and younger brother live in the non-existant Arizona and by putting in vacation time just hours ago I am setting out on the journey to find Arizona. My brother, after some hardships, is graduating high school and since the last time I saw either of them was nearly 3 years ago, Al and figure it's about time.

So, we'll get to watch my brother walk across a stage - or like me, a football field - with (what he claims) about 7 other people. I'm incredibly excited - not only to see my mom and brother - but to get the hell out of dodge.

It's been years since I've actually been anywhere other than Texas and Alfred the furthest he's gone is Louisiana. We were going to fly, but we thought a road trip would be much more fun. Also, my sister informed me about a month ago of her plans to move to Colorado. Why? Because she can. I love her spontaneity and her 'I can do anything' attitude. So, she's staying in Texas till May and then will make the 20 hour drive with us.

We'll leave her in Arizona, once we find it, and from there she'll fly up to Colorado to start her life over. So very proud.

Now, we'll be in a vehicle for an incredibly long time and our radio station will only last for so long before it drowns in static. I'm making lists of songs we want to listen to - nothing in particular because it's such a long drive there's no telling what our moods will be and when so I'd like a wide variety of things.

I'm not the most up to date person when it comes to music, so I'd like to request your help. What do you like to listen to? Favorite songs? Sad, happy, rap, r&b, country, jazz - whatever - I'm looking to broaden my horizons and I think this trip could be just the thing to do it.

So, what are your recommendations for music?